I last wrote in July 2020 and have LOTS to update you on! The summer was pretty slow for me. I started the Emotion Regulation Pathway in August 2020 which was pretty basic to begin with but we concentrated mainly on Impulsivity which I tend to struggle with. I have found that continuing with it …
Tag Archives: mental health
Wading Through Grief
I have many experiences of grief. I’ve been to more funerals than I have weddings which is a deep shame. Everyone who has lost someone goes through the seven stages of grief; Shock and Denial; you may deny the loss or remain in shock for emotional protection. Pain and Guilt; it is important to experience …
Honesty/Hypocrisy: You Choose
I have never professed to be perfect. In fact, in my family, I’m the fuck up. The black sheep. The disappointment. And no this isn’t a beg for “oh surely not” comments; I genuinely am and I’ve radically accepted that. And, at times, I live up to it. I recently posted a video on my …
Why Suicide Isn’t Selfish
**TRIGGER WARNING** This blog post mentions suicide, suicidality and feelings and emotions attached to this action. There will be no disclosure on specific methods, means and if you are feeling suicidal now please Google your local Crisis Centre, hospital or if, like me, you’re in the UK, the Samaritans are there 24/7, 365 days a …
Home Leave
Hospital was becoming less effective and although I am not “fixed”, I thought I was at least on my way. I was supposed to go on leave Friday to Sunday and then back for discharge Monday morning but I made the informed decision that I wanted to get back to my ‘normal’ as soon as …
The Fog
I’m starting to think clearer again. Over the past eleven days since my almost fatal overdose, I’m starting to feel more myself. The doctor on my ward is a tough love kinda guy which works well for people like me, not so much for others who need the namby-pamby approach. He says it like it …
What’s New?
I am currently situated in a psychiatric ward somewhere in the Midlands, UK. I have been on this ward before and its fully of, mostly, lovely staff. I have caused some serious hurt in the past few weeks, and some confusion so I am here to clear that up. I have been lying and deceiving …
My Experience of Hallucinations
I experience visual and auditory hallucinations. To me, I am several shades of fucked up. BACKGROUND: I was sexually abused as a child by a relative, which last between the ages of 7 and 12, and I still remember to this day how he smelt. How cold his hands were. How painful it was. How …
World Mental Health Day 2019: Suicide Prevention
It’s World Mental Health Day 2019 and this year’s theme is Suicide Prevention. EVERY DAY is Awareness Day for me and my fellow warriors.•The NHS, as wonderful as this institution is, is SEVERELY underfunded when it comes to mental health. We can raise awareness across social media, we can raise funds for Mind/Samaritans/Papyrus and the …
Continue reading “World Mental Health Day 2019: Suicide Prevention”
Time Out, Thanks
On Friday 4th October I took a concoction of medication and a bottle of wine and my suicide attempt was intervened by police officers. Because of the nature of what I took, I was taken straight to Resus at our local hospital. I woke up in the early hours of Sunday morning. WHY???? Because I’m …
The Warrior Within 